Desire is one of those concepts that are so sticky it attaches to everything we do, like a pile of Krazy Glue you just put your hand in. Everything you touch becomes a sticky mess of desire. Desire of another being, sexual desire, material desire, desire to speak to a friend now that they have passed, or simply the desire to be present in this moment; desire can be the greatest cause of suffering.

Just when you feel you are making great progress you get hit with a wave of feelings that don’t feel very present and bring you back to why you started to study Buddhism to begin with. This usually happens after a great and profound moment of presence, one slips into the glue of desire.

It’s one aspect I’ve not felt in a long while but here it is, sticking to everything. Lately all I can think of is desire and for sure it’s caused suffering. Energy spinning out of control, thoughts on the future as opposed to right now. It causes a physiological response; blood pressure, heart rate, breathing, and also affects how balanced ones chakras are.

What’s the answer? Practice. The mind is untrained and wants to bathe in desire, it’s what it does. Meditation practice helps even if it seems not to. During meditation my mind can jump from the tallest of trees with only a fraction of presence. Then during normal operation my mind causes the sticky stuck thoughts that cause my suffering. Do I feel better equipped than before meditation and Buddhism, yes.

One doesn’t have to meditate or to study Buddhism to know that desire is the most tricky of thoughts, as we get caught up in what we want but do not have. This does not mean to not dream to want but to look at it when it happens and see how it fills in the gaps and creates falseness, leading out minds to not see the truth.

It’s been a struggle for me, but this is good, it allows me to have something sticky to observe and see in the here and now.

From The Beginner’s Guide to Insight Meditation by Arinna Weisman and Jean Smith:

Sensual Desire

“In our meditation practice, through awareness we can separate desire from it’s object and examine desire itself. If we desire soft, easy, smooth breaths, we can turn our attention to desire and see how it takes us out of the present moment and into the future. We can feel the contraction and pulling of it, and we can see how it can bring restlessness or doubt and all kinds of thoughts associated with it. This examination can give us exceptional insight as to how desire operates in our life – how it adheres to its object, how it makes its object more attractive than it really is and blinds us to its unattractive aspects. We can examine how insatiable desire is.”

What does one do when they are gripped with desire?

Concentration, aiming the mind at the breath or another object of meditation such as lovingkindness, is one antidote to desire.

Even if we are not meditating, when we notice desire, we can try to let it go by switching our attention to something else, such as our posture or what we are hearing or seeing, or by just thinking of something else – remaining attentive to this alternative object or experience.

Bringing us back to the present moment.

This does not void us of the future or planning but it keeps us from wildly sticking to what we do not know of desire. To want something and then to goal and plan for it is good but to dwell and wonder and want and think and desire…..this will be suffering. Try it, I know it is.

It all comes back to anicha and the impermanence of things, things change, we all know it. Nothing stays the same, constant flux. Desire comes and it will go, replaced with other things. In a relationship desire is left with good and bad times, some luck and more difficulty, then some more easiness. It all changed and at the beginning you felt that this was the one, the mate you had waited for your whole life.

Watch desire, see what it looks like. Can you live with it?

Even now as I write this I have desire, desire that has been with me for days and doesn’t seem to want to let go.

Ain’t this fun? Yup

And sometimes desires are acknowledged but still don’t go away. Even if it was easier than you thought to purge it.

UPDATE: It never goes away, this was incorrect thinking on my part, the goal is to not have the ego beating me up over it. It simply is what it is.

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