Upeksha & True Love, Attaining Equanimity
July 30, 2007 · Print This Article
Upeksha
The concept of “Upeksha” has come up on my blog stats many times in the last few week, as a keyword on how people find this blog it’s at the top. So, I thought I’d bring up an old post I wrote, talking about a Thick Nhat Hann book on “True Love”.
Upeksha - equanimity or freedom, when you love you bring freedom to the person you love, loving in such a way as the other person you love feels free; “Dear one, do you have enough space in you heart and all around you?”
Of the 4 aspects of love, this is the most difficult for me.
Equanimity = e·qua·nim·i·ty 
[ee-kwuh-nim-i-tee, ek-wuh-] Pronunciation Key - Show IPA Pronunciation –noun mental or emotional stability or composure, esp. under tension or strain; calmness; equilibrium.
Non-attachment = ‘Non-attachment…views desire as faulty, thereby deliberately restraining desire…’
Nondiscrimination
Even-mindedness or letting go
“Upa” means ‘over’ and “iksh” means ‘to look’. Basically you look over around, under and beyond, seeing the whole situation and not a small facet. Ability to see everyone and everything as equal and not with discrimination. No ’self’ and no ‘other’.
From Thick’s book, a few words that hit home: “Without upeksha, your love may become possessive. A summer breeze can be very refreshing; but if we try to put it in a tin can so we can have it entirely for ourselves, the breeze will die. Our beloved is the same.”
“True love allows you to preserve your freedom and the freedom of your beloved. That is upeksha.”
I’ve realized that I need much work in this area, so plan on seeing more as I work and develop this in myself.
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I will look forward to more articles like this. I am glad I discovered your blog.
Hi Patricia, I’m glad you liked this, it’s one of my favorite topics and one I struggle with the most. :0
Just to clarify, the “Upeksha” text you show is actually Tibetan for “btag Snyoms”. In researching text for a tattoo, I saw your image for “Upeksha”, and did a little digging to make sure it was the right translation. I could see the font was a Tibetan one, not Sanskrit, so I did a loose translation in Tibetan, and it didn’t phonetically match “Upeksha”, so I looked up the Tibetan translation for Upeksha (a Sandskrit word) and found it to be “Btag Snyoms”, which matched the phonetic translation I had made from the script. This does not change the meaning of the image, just the word that matches the script. Beautiful! I think I will go ahead and get it inked. Thanks for starting this research for me! K
Kim, thank you so much for the clarification, I really appreciate it! Kris